Memories
When someone passes away, many of us want to show our support and sympathy. A common question during this time is: should I send flowers or make a donation? Understanding what’s appropriate can be confusing, especially during such a delicate time. Today, more families are sharing specific wishes, and it’s important to respect their preferences.
Flowers: A Traditional Gesture of Sympathy
Sending flowers has long been a way to express condolences. Floral arrangements bring beauty and comfort to funerals and memorials. They can symbolize love, peace, and remembrance. If no other instructions are given, flowers are usually a safe and thoughtful choice.
Some common types of sympathy flowers include lilies, roses, and carnations. Wreaths, sprays, and simple bouquets can be sent to the funeral home or the family’s home. It's best to include a short, heartfelt message with your flowers.
Donations: A Growing Trend in Modern Memorials
In recent years, many families are asking for donations instead of flowers. These donations often go to a cause that was important to the deceased or to a charity supporting a health condition or community effort.
Choosing to give a donation is a meaningful way to honor someone’s legacy. It can also offer comfort to grieving families to see support for something their loved one cared deeply about.
If the family has included donation details in the obituary or service invitation, it's a clear sign that this is their preference. Be sure to follow any instructions about where and how to give. Some families also ask for donations to help with funeral costs, which is also perfectly acceptable.
How to Decide: Flowers or Donation?
Check the family’s wishes: If they have asked for donations instead of flowers, it’s respectful to follow that request.
Consider your connection: Close friends or family members may want to do both – send flowers and give a donation.
Personal meaning: Think about what would have meant most to the person who passed away. Did they love nature or support a specific cause?
Sending Both: Is It Okay?
Yes, it is perfectly fine to send flowers and make a donation if you feel moved to do so. You can also include a note explaining your gesture: for example, “In memory of John, we’ve made a donation towards his funeral planning and are sending flowers with love.”
A Thoughtful Way to Show You Care
Whether you choose to send flowers, make a donation, or both, the most important thing is that your gesture comes from the heart. During times of loss, small acts of kindness mean a great deal.
Funeral etiquette may change over time, but compassion never goes out of style. Respecting the wishes of the grieving family, while offering comfort and support, is always the right choice.
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